A fellow died this week who was a very major influence in my life. I only saw Roy 4 or 5 times in my life but one of his decisions changed my life forever. I always knew where Roy was but I did not have any contact with him. I taught his two boys and a few years ago bumped into his wife on the bike trails.
In 1969 we applied for adoption. At that time the province handled all adoptions under the social development Dept. They had very strict protocol to follow in assessing if a couple would be suitable parents for adoption.
Roy was our guy. He had to go through the procedure and make sure that all information was collected. In our application we had to include the usual information on date and place of birth and much more. We had to give our family background. My wife's family was anything but normal. We had to provide a number of references. We had just moved to a new town and didn't know anybody so references had to be from people who were far away. My wife was born in England but had become a Canadian citizen. We worried about these things. Rumors abounded about how tough it was to be accepted as a parent for adoption.
Then came the big interview and home inspection. The interview was relaxed and informal but took about 2 hours and a few cups of coffee. They really looked through your house. You had to provide financial information.
After all that he said it would be about 2 months before we would hear yes or no. We were on edge for the two months but we were accepted.
So having children and parenting has been one of the most rewarding parts of my life. It also changed my whole life. From that time on someone depended on me and I had to be a responsible provider.
Now I know that more than just Roy was involved in the decision to accept us as parents who were suitable to adopt children, but I like to think that Roy had a large part in the decision.
So with Roy's passing this week it was one more time for reflection on my life.